Well driving with Hannah is an amazing experince I'll have to say. And if you haven't done it...well you'll have to wait untill november. My favorite thing is turning up the music and hot air and rolling down the windows, yeah not many people will do that with me so for those who do, you are true friends. : )
You know these past couple weeks have been like the worst of my life! Ok not the worst but pretty bad. Like I look at myself and think I'm pretty pitiful. Well you could just say I am an emotional girl. Oh well such is life. I've learned way to hard a lesson these past weeks and I almost wish I could just skip these lessons but I know I need them. But it is getting better, I think I'm seeing the rainbow after the rain.

This weekend was simply lovely...
walking to starbucks, picking flowers, Carl giving me a broken chair so I fell, driving 2 hours in a car that is breaking down, having to pee so bad I thought I was going to die, the freaky bathroom with mirrors everywhere that we finaly stoped at, Kate being cold and almost making me fall of the bed from trying to take my body heat, singing and dancing in the car, being getto, shocking my aunt by listening to and singing along to grilz, my aunt embarrasing me by telling this lady I should hook up with her son while I was sitting there, laughing, spilling coffee on my shirt at church, jumping in the freezing cold pool to get the net out because no on would get in, being coverd in ants, watching a movie on Mike's lap-top and having no clue what was happening cuz I couldn't hear it, gettting some really exciting purses from my Aunt, and well lots of other silly things that I like doing...
yeah I need more weekends like this.

Well here is one of my faviorte pictures from this summer...It shows the fun, the sweat, the dirtyness and some awesome girls all in one picture! We look so silly. Ashley is laughing and has black stuff on her face from sanding chairs, Hannah is showing the coolness of being a barney by holding her frapachino, I am "glowing" from all the work and heat! and my shirt has black smudges on it from who knows what and then Kelsey has black stuff on here shirt too! I wish I was going back to the hay field this summer. It is so much fun. It is even more fun being a barney cuz they are there just to break the rules. Like taking showers everday instead of once a week!! And other stuff but I won't spill all our secrets ; ) I just pretty much think everyone should go on Royal Servants! Hopefully I will be back at training camp next summer...

This is just a cute story I read awhile back and came across it again today while I was helping my mom.


The Garden - by Douglas Wilson

As my horse trotted wearily up the road, I could see the walls of a beautiful garden ahead. Outside the gate was an equally beautiful woman. At the sound of my greeting, she turned and dropped a curtsey. "Good sir... good morning."

I looked at her, and then at the garden walls extending out to the right and left. Behind her was the garden gate. I said, "I am very thirsty...for something clean." She smiled, and her smile made me thirstier still. But she said nothing. "Is there water here?" I asked.

"There is a stream within my garden." Her statement was simply a statement of fact; there was no invitation at all in it.

I asked, "May I come in and drink?"

"No," she said. "The lord of my mother's garden does not permit that."

"Why is this? Other women have let me drink from the gardens that they tend." I glanced at the fruit-laden branches, which were visible over the top of the garden wall. "You have a lovely garden, but those who let me drink had gardens just as beautiful."

She laughed at this, and her laugh was merry indeed. "I have no doubt that you have been in some lovely gardens. But was the water clean?"

"No," I said, and in spite of myself, turned my head and looked down.

She continued with a question. "Is that why you are no longer in the gardens tended by these women?"

I was ashamed so I did not answer her. Instead I looked past her into the garden. The path through the gate disappeared after a few feet, leaving the view of anyone on the road. "It seems like a shame for such a garden to go to waste."

She seemed both puzzled and amused. "How does it go to waste?"

"Does any man drink from your stream?"

"No, but no man fouls it either."

"But is that not a waste? Was not your stream made to quench the thirst of travelers?"

"I'm afraid you are seriously mistaken. It was made to quench the thirst, not of travelers, but of the lord of the garden."

"Oh," I said, "this garden has a lord?"

"No," she said.

"Then I don't understand. Are you speaking in riddles?"

She smiled. "No, I do not. The garden will one day have a lord, although it does not yet. The stream is for him alone."

"And who will your lord be?"

"When my mother's lord gives a blessing, the one whom I appoint."

"How can the lesser appoint the greater?"

"How can it not be so? When my lord comes, I will grant to him my garden. But until I do, he is just another traveler."

"And what do you look for? I am sure there are many who knock at your gate."

At this she blushed slightly but looked straight at me. "I will not have a lord who does not have a lord himself--my lord must have taken an oath of fealty to the Landlord."

"The Landlord? Who is he?"

"He is the owner of all the gardens along this road. In order to come into my garden, my lord must take an oath before the Landlord to tend the garden well. He must also swear that he will enter no other garden."I had never heard such words as these before. "How long must he stay out of other gardens?"

"Forever."

"But what if he is born to travel?"

"Then he is not born for my garden."

"I see," I said, becoming a little angry. "Then why have I never heard of such an oath? I have been in many gardens."

"Yes, you said that before. But was the water clean? Were the gardens tended? That is what happens when there is no oath."

"So that is all? If someone takes an oath before this Landlord, you will make them your Lord?"

"No."

"Well, what else then?"

"There are many men who think they can tend my garden well, and who would be willing to swear an oath before the Landlord saying so. But that does not mean that my mother's lord, or I, share their confidence."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean that I know the extent of the garden. I have a knowledge of it that cannot be gained from the road. But no man can share that knowledge until after I have made him my lord and husband. So I must have the measure of the man before."

"So what must a man do?"

"The first thing is to--"

"Yes, I know. He must swear to the Landlord. But after?"

"He must return to me, and ask to see my mother's lord."

"And what would he say?"

"That depends on the man."

At this parting comment, she turned and walked slowly back into the garden, pulling the gate closed behind her. I spurred my horse, which began to trot down the road. I did not know what to think, but I needed to find this Landlord.

Well I am offically not going to college group at my church till october. Oh well. I am to young. Man I really am glad I'm graduating early I just hate being "to young" My dad told me that there are always thorns on a rose and so this is my thorn. I have even been called jail bate now! haha I thought that was pretty funny. Thats me! I think I'm going to just go to college group at a differnt church where some of my other friends go. Anyways no more sad talk I don't wanna be upset I just need to get over it.

I just have to say that my friend Hannah is so funny!!! She makes me laugh so hard. here are some quotes of stuff she has said to me...
"Hannah you are a really messy eater. But that is ok cuz when you make a mess eating it just means you are having a lot of fun"
"That is kinda sketchy , but I think Hannah's like being sketchy so ya know what, I approve"
"I don't get it so lets just pretend likes it funny"
A really funny thing she does is acting getto (whatever that means I still don't know) and she trys to get me to do it also. She really knows how to make me laugh. When she was visiting I think I had a constant pain in my stomach from laughing so hard all the time. Like when I was making malto for our breakfast and she was making our peanut butter and honey sandwiches. I thought I had made enough peanut butter and honey for 3 half sandwichs but she made like 6 out of it!!! That is only because a put a LOT of peanut butter and honey in the sandwichs when I make them and she puts a normal amount in it. : )
Well I just did a whole post about nothing really...oh well.

The Civil War Ball...

Well here are some pictures from the civil war ball we went to a week or so ago. It is pretty crazy how many we have now that people are starting to realize they are fun!haha I have now I think been to six. And then I am going to another one in a couple months with the Macs in Crestline (I've gotta say that is a cool place with cool people)
anyways here are the pictures...

little Lydia on the way to the civil war ball...

Michael and Brittany

a picture from our little photo shoot before the dancing started

Southern belles
Kaleb and I waiting for the dance to start

Well tonight at youth group we were singing this one song and I really started to miss my little park that I used to walk to and do my devos at. I decided next clear day we have I will walk there again. I love sitting outside on the grass with the trees and blue sky as my ceiling. Even though I always seem to go when school is getting out and all the kids look at me funny, But hey I'm ok with that. That picture of a tree is one I took one time at the park.

I just finished reading 'The Great Divorce' It took me a long time to read it because I would read a chapter and then be like 'umm what did I just read' and then read it again. But I finished it. I really enjoyed reading it.


"Through the Lord's mercies we are not consumed, Because His compassions fail not.
They are new every morning, Great is Your faithfulness.
"The Lord is my portion." says my soul, "Therefore I hope in Him!""
Lamentations 3:22-24

I love the rain...today driving home from youth group I turned off my music so I could just hear the rain and I even rolled my window down cuz it feels amazing when the rain hits your hands. It's days like this I want to drink hot tea and read a book, well more like drink tea and make my civil war dress seeing as that is what I've been doing all day. But I am happy to say it is almost finished! It should be done tomorrow (hopefully).

I will leave you with a funny picture of me and Britt and 2 of our friends Chris and Kyle. We have known them pretty much forever, well since I was about 2 because that is when we have a video that says how my best friend is Christopher. Then they moved and now we only see them about once a year. It is pretty funny to look back and see how much we've changed.

"I believe in Christianty as I believe that the sun has risen; not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything" C.S. Lewis

"You can't love someone for what they stand for, who they seem to be, you have to love them for there detals, for the little things that are true to only them." Roselee Futch (with a date with Tad Hamilton)

"Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow; it empties today of its strength" Corrie ten Boom

"God didn't call us to be successfull, just faithful." Mother Teresa

"There is no half singing in the shower you are either a rock star or opera diva" Josh Groban

Well today I went hankie shoping with some friends. We went to this awesome little, well actully it was pretty big, antique store that had tons of hankies in it. I got one white one with some lace on it and then another white one with a chicken on it! So it was random and I had to get it. Then I went crazy getting ready for our friends to come over for dinner. It was a fun and really busy day!

Happy St. Patricks Day!!!!!

Joanna Grace (aka Grumpy Gracie)

So Jo is pretty much the funnest little 4 year I know. Me and her are little buddies and we pretty much just mess around and laugh all day. Except for when she decided she doesn't like me. I have never met such a little drama queen in my life!!!

She always finds something exciting to do. Like using markers as lipstick or having me dress her up like a pirate and then she'll chase everyone around the house.

One of the things she loves to do is sing Josh Groban songs. And then her new thing she always tells me about is how she is going to marry my friend Josh.haha

Yeah she is a crazy little girl.

The other day me and my mom had to go to a meeting that was an hour away so and on the drive we talked about submission. yup. It is an amazing subject. It breaks me heart to see the way women are leaving behind God's will of women submiting to there husbands. I am actully reading a book right now called 'created to be his help meet' by Debbie Pearl. So maybe it is a book for married women but I mean come on why wait to get married and mess up and then read the book? I might as well learn now. I could pretty much write pages and pages about it but I won't, I will just say I am excited to submit to my husband someday and be his help meet and through that honor God. In Titus 2 it says "older women likewise...that they may admonish the younger women to love their husbands, to love thier children, to be discreet, chaste, homemakers, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be blasphemed." I am so greatful that God has given me so many examples of Godly women.

Crepe party

I finaly learned how to make crepes! thanks to my great teacher Emma : ) A week or so ago my friends had a crepe party. it was pretty fun. me and Emma ended up pretty much making crepes for everyone and there were like 10 people there so making crepes for that many people takes a while.

in between making crepes for everyone me and emma found time to take pictures, lots of pictures but i'm only going to put a few cuz we took a ton!
There really were more people at this party it is just that me and Emma made the crepes so by the time we sat down there was no room left at the table they we all at. and we have this thing that whenever we see each other we take a million pictures together


this was probably the funnest picture we took all night. I don't know what we were thinking when we took it because we look like total dorks.

This is a list me and my friend made of everything I did for my first time in MN last summer.

Hannah's Fisrt time list:
-going to Minnesota
-going to Wisconsin
-tubing
-swiming near (almost in) a waterfall
-gotten a leach on the leg
-hiked tettegouche
-saw split rock lighthouse
-swam in lake superior-a "great lake!"
-worked at a camp (camp lebanon)
-went in a paddleboat
-saw a loon
-caught a fish
-took a fish off the hook
-got a hook stuck in finger
-went to a twins game at the metrodome
-rode the MN lightrail
-went to the mall of America
-gagged over cleaning bathrooms
-grew an irishman-'seamus'
-had sweet and sour meat balls with pinapple and rice
-ate fruit with ice cream
-watched National Treasure
-made carepacks
-ate rhybarb
-had crepes

A night out with the girls from youth group...

Royal Servants Ireland team 2004.

Yup the Ireland trip was pretty much amazing...

God is our Romancer. amazing thought. The God who made the universe and knows every star in the sky is in love with me and wants me to be totally and completly in love with Him. He wrote a whole book of letters just for us. I don't know maybe it is just me but I love that thought. it is so humbling. And you know what? I am totally in love with God. He is amazing. Like I can't even put into words how in love I am. Each and every day all that happens is I just fall more in love. Yup and that is pretty much all I have to say.

Beautiful Soldier
She's a beautiful soldier who
wears knee boots instead
of combat boots and has
never set foot in a desert.
If you passed her on the street,
you'd probably think
she doesn't have a problem
in the world.

(i didn't write that i actully just read it and thought it sounded really cool and like most christian girls living on this place called earth)

Galatians 5:13 'For you brethren, have been called to liberty; only do not use liberty as an opportunity for the flesh, but through love serve one another.'

What I think this verse means is that we are free but but since we are free we should serve each other, and not serve each other because we have to but out of love. Serving each other because we love them.

Last summer I went on a mission trip with royal servants and I fell in love with that group. So this summer I went back except I just went to training camp and went to serve. I also went to camp Lebanon in Upsala MN.

At the camps I did the behind the scens things that keep the camp runing. I did odd jobs such as cleaning bathrooms, washing tarps and seting up and taking down tents. But my most important job was encourgment. At the royal servants training camp part of our 'job' was to encourge the students, staff and leaders who were going over seas. The team I was on was made up of alumni and the name of our team was Barnabas which means 'Son of encougment'. Some of the ways we encourged was that every night we did a prayer walk and we wrote letters to the team leaders.

Through out the hours spent cleaning bathrooms and days spent standing in the hot sun some of the things God taught me were...

That is it so important to keep encourging your brothers and sisters in there walk with Christ, Satan is constantly trying to bring us down in our walk with Christ even though we don't always see it we always need to be praying not only for ourselves but for those around us, And then through how utterly tired I got I was reminded that we need to give everday to God and rely on Him to give us the strenght we need to make it through each day.

Being at royal servant training camp and not on a team I was able to see the ways God worked in the big things like the teams getting the support money they needed to go over seas to the small things like we counted the passport holders and came up 6 short and then I was sorting through the blue bags and opened up a zipper pouch and there were 6 passport holders in it.

As you see I didn't go over seas this summer but that isn't the only place we are needed. God can use you right here in the USA to do work for Him and further His kingdom. You just need to be open to His calling and ready for the moments He gives you.

God has been more then faithful this summer. He helped me make it through every day when I felt like that last bit of strength was gone. And I just want to thank you all for the prayers and letters I got while I was gone. It is so engouging to know that you all support me and what I feel called to do.




On sunday evening a couple weeks ago me and some of the other high schoolers who went on mission trips this summer and camps all talked about what we did/learned over the summer. So that is what I said (well not like word for word seeing as I didn't read it or memorize it or anything like that).

-For Good- Wicked (the musical)

I've heard it said
That people come into our lives for a reason
Bringing something we must learn
And we are led
To those who help us most to grow
If we let them
And we help them in return
Well, I don't know if I believe that's true
But I know I'm who I am today
Because I knew you

Like a comet pulled from orbit
As it passes a sun
Like a stream that meets a boulder
Halfway through the wood
Who can say if I've been changed for the better?
But because I knew you
I have been changed for good

It well may be
That we will never meet again
In this lifetime
So let me say before we part
So much of me
Is made of what I learned from you
You'll be with me
Like a handprint on my heart
And now whatever way our stories end
I know you have re-written mine
By being my friend...

Like a ship blown from its mooring
By a wind off the sea
Like a seed dropped by a skybird
In a distant wood
Who can say if I've been changed for the better?
But because I knew you

Because I knew you
I have been changed for good
And just to clear the air
I ask forgiveness
For the thing I've done you blame me for
But then, I guess we know
There's blame to share
And none of it seems to matter anymore

Like a comet pulled from orbit
As it passes a sun
Like a stream that meets a boulder
Halfway through the wood

Like a ship blown from its mooring
By a wind off the sea
Like a seed dropped by a bird in the wood
Who can say if I've been
Changed for the better?
I do believe I have been
Changed for the better

Because I knew you...
I have been changed for good.

my girls that I did book time with. I miss all the girls so much, I can't wait till next school year!!!

the 3rd and 4th grade girls awana group i worked with over the last school year.

this is what happens when the youth from church go out to dessert together! haha

you know i love tea. i went to ireland and london and the british people got to me and i love tea! so right now i made my self a nice cup of tea. i used to only like it with milk and honey in it but then i decided the it wasn't as good for me then so now i drink it stright up (well sometimes i add milk and honey but not a lot).

ok so i'm in a random mood and just did a whole post about tea. yup good stuff. here i'll add a cool quote to the end!

'The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of there dreams' -Elenor Roosevelt

Give of your best to the Master
Give of the strength of your youth;
Throw your soul's fresh,
Growing ardor,
Into the battle for truth.
Jesus has set the example;
Dauntless was He,
Young and brave;
Give Him your loyal devotion,
Give Him the best that you have

~Howard Grose


Lately I've been feeling like i need to give God everything i possibly can. Like i'll admit sometimes i want to date. but i know that would be a part that woldn't be God's anymore...i need to give him my attractiveness and my beauty...i need to give Him my attention...that would be fulfiling my dreams but don't want to live my dreams i want to live Gods dreams for me. I just want to give God my all, in ever since of the word all, that is what i want to give Him. And ok you caught me i'm not right now, but i want to, i want God to have every little thing.

and those are my thoughts right now.

if you click on the picture it will show you a bigger one.

after the ball a bunch of us went to starbucks and then all of us girls took our pic with the guy working there!haha oh his name is Ben.

Me, Bizzy and Brittany having fun with the roses we got

some of us girls at the civil war ball. (i am the 6th in from the right)

taking a break from dancing at the civil war ball

ok so i am sick for the 3rd time in a row. yup this is life. i think i got sick this time from not enough sleep mixed with working to hard.
I went to a civil war ball last night!! it was so fun. Somehow I finished my dress before I had to leave! I was all with God's help I can tell you that I finished it. And then after the ball a bunch of us went to starbucks, the guy there Ben was great he was all into it all, So of course we had to take our picture with him.hahaha Then we went to one of my friends house and played games till me and bizzy left around like 1:30 but we didn't get to sleep till like 2:30. Yeah 7:30 came way to quick this morning.
Ok here are some of the main lines from our sermon this morning. (ok i know random but i really like it!)
'when God takes things away from us, we must not become bitter, but we must trust Him always'
'Faith assists works, works perfect faith'
'works perfect faith, that is, they bring faith to maturity, so that you must see works if there is true faith'

And then i love questions. like...
what does music have to have?
a. singer b. instruments c. composer d. sound
ok so first i thought sound but then i was like wait i don't know if i'm just weird but can't you have like the music of silence? So i decided that you have to have a composer. Because God is the composer of everything. ok i had more to say but i think this sickness is geting to me cuz my head hurts and i can't think of what else i was gonna say. hahaha

ok here is a question my pastor asked this morning and i am still thinking about it.
If someone came up to you and asked 'Are you a christian?' and then you said 'yes' and then they said 'ok prove it' what would you do?

me and my brother Robby at disneyland.

that is me and my sisters on the tea cups at disneyland!! and not just any tea cup but the pink one!! horray for us! heehee

ok peole i need to know should i...

leave my hair like it is kinda short and fliped out?
or
should i grow it out? which means i would grow it out to like a little past my sholders?

yeah that is the question of the week! i want to know what you all think. so please share!

The Real Rules of Women
-some random thing i found online-

-They seem to think that going to the bathroom is a social event, not a bodily function
-Women are rarely right the first time, but they excel at changing their minds.
-They are often quite opinionated, but they don't have a clue why.
-Women spend more time doing useless things like fixing their hair than really important things like fixing dinner
-Their attention spans can't handle talking about a single subject for more than 30 seconds.
-Women think the speed limit is a government-approved suggestion and that those double yellow lines are merely for decorating the road.
-They cry when they are sad, angry, upset, happy, frustrated, or whenever else an opportunity is presented.
-They think the death of a pet hamster is one of the most traumatic events of their childhood
-If you don't notice their new haircut, sweater, socks, nail polish, ect., you might as well kiss friendship goodbye.
-They root for the football team with the prettiest uniforms.
-They ask questions that have absolutely no right answer. "Do you think I'm gaining weight?"
-Among the things they think essential to sustain life, they list shopping malls.


ok so i thought it was funny and random and felt like sharing some stuff about us women. most of that stuff is true i think, or at least for me it is. : )

me, olivia, and britt on resurection sunday. yeah look at them hot people. hahaha

life is full of rejection...
that is what i have been finding out lately. My "friends" do it all the time, my school group, and now even my church!! yeah my church, I mean you would think they would be there for me to build me up, well they arn't.
But when i start feeling rejected I just go to God and He holds me close and tells me that He loves me and He will always be there no matter what. You know how amazing it is to be Gods child? I mean i don't know how i could have made it here with out His help. I love Him so much. Like I can't even put it into words. I am in love!!! : ) What can i say.
Someone once told me that i always have something positive to say about life. Well that is only with Gods help i am like that. I think that person was kinda annoyed with me, haha, well i took it as a complement!
Well I am in love. As Josh would say God is stark raving amazing. haha what ever that means. actully after the definition i understand now i think : )

Ten question survey, but it isn't as easy as it looks! Pick a band, and using ONLY that band's song titles, answer the questions to best fit you.

Band of Choice: the Supremes
1. Are you male or female? Natural Woman
2. Describe yourself: Baby Love
3. How do some people feel about you? My World Is Empty Without You
4. How do you feel about yourself? Nothing But Heartaches
5. Describe your girlfriend/boyfriend/interest:) A Breath Taking Guy
6. Where would you rather be? Standing At The Crossroads Of Love
7. Describe what you want to be: Crumbs Off The Table
8. Describe how you live: Feel Like Makin' Love
9. Describe how you love: Up The Ladder To The Roof
10. Share a few words of wisdom: Run, Run, Run

So right now I am kinda sick with a cold and as the night gets later and later my voice gets deeper. It makes me remember the convo I had with my friends when Brianna was sick and her voice was getting deep and Kate was standing there saying 'well you know brianna some guys find deep voices attractive' and Brianna was all 'well I have a boyfriend so I don't need to attract any guys!' So sitting here tonight I can't help but feel attrative with my deep manly voice!! ok so maybe not but I can get a good laugh out of having a manly voice.

yup that is me and my sister!!!heehee I am the one with the really blonde hair. We are in our princess pj's!! horray for us!

ok i don't know what got into me but for some reason i took a picture of my feet with a dandelion!haha random i know but i love the pic!! 

My photography from the ski trip! I love taking pictures. 

me and Bizzy were lodgers at the ski trip we went on! heehee It was fun. 

I'm Part of the fellowship of the unashamed.

I have the Holy Spirit power.

The die has been cast.

I have stepped ove the line.

The decision has been made- I'm a Disciple of His.

I won't look back, let up, slow down , back away or be still.

My past is redeemed, my prescence makes sense, my future sucure.

I'm finished and done with low living, sight walking, smooth knees , colorless dreams, famed visions, worldly talking, cheap giving and dwarfed goals.

I no longer need preeminence, position, promotions, plaudits or popularity.

I dont have to be right, first, tops, recognized, praised, regarded or rewarded.

I now live by faith, lean in His presence, walk by paitence, am uplifted by prayer, and I labor with power.

My face is set, my gait is fast, my goal is heaven.

My road narrow, my way rough, my companions are few, My Guide reliable and my mission clear.

I cannot be bought, comprimised, detoured, lured away,turned back deluded or delayed.

I will not flinch in the face of the sacrifice, hesitate in the prescence of the enemy, pander in the pool of popularity, or meanderin the maze of meadiocracy.

I won't give, shut up or let up ,until ive stayed up stored up, prayed up, paid up, and preach up for the cause of Christ.

I am a disciple of Jesus.

I must go till He comes, give till I drop , preach till all know , and work till He stops me.

And, when He comes for his own,
He will have no problem reconizing me...

MY BANNER WILL BE CLEAR!

- Written by a young pastor in Zimbabwe, Africa, before being martyred for his faith in Christ

I just read that and I thought it was amazing. I hope and pray that if I am faced with being killed because of my faith I will respond in a way like him.

Hello all,
Well I just got back from a worship concert thing at my church. It was really awesome. It was with 3 of the guys who are usual in our Sunday morning worship band and then this one guy Chris (the reason we were having this) who used to go to our church and his friend. It was funny because they were pretending like it was a real concert so they were totally rocking out and at the end Chris was like 'you guys are the best concert we've played!!' and stuff like that. It was fun.

But on a more serious house Chris kind told his testomny and he was like 'I want to tell you about the happiest day of my life' But he started nine month earlier and told about the day him and his wife found out she was pregnate and then showed a cute video of the day because they video taped like it all. Ok so by now I was getting all tearied up and you will find out why. Then he said something like 'then five month later my wife woke up one morning and went over to our babes bed which was next to ours and he wasn't moving or breathing and I went over and check him and then we called the ambulance' They got to the hospital and they said there was nothing they could do and on November 10th baby Silas died. So of course I had the seat right behind Cheryl (chris' wife) and Chris' sister Tracy and they were both crying and then Tracys daughter who is around 8 or 9 and she started crying! It was so sad and sweet and I couldn't help it the tears fell down my face. I can't even imagine what it must be like. And I have a great respect for Chris and Cheryl and how they haven't blamed God about this all and how they are leaning on Him for strength and peace and knowing that they will see there son again in heaven.

So yeah that was my evening. Prompted some interesting decisions. Well I guess that is it for now.

me with short red hair... ok it is a wig  

me and my little sister Jo having fun 

~Once Again~
By Hannah Arlene

Here I am broken again
Wonded and not wanting to go on
Show me Your love once again
i need Your help

I'm falling into Your arms again
Wrap me close and let me know You are there
I'm cold by the ways of this world warm me in Your loving arms once again

Someday I'll be with You forever
A place where I won't shed another tear
Please help me press on and not give up
I need You now

me and my d-group leader Brianna playing chess in Ireland!! 

me at the beach!  

~You can't hurry love~
I need love, love to ease my mind
I need to find, find someone to call mine
but mama said

* you can't hurry love
oh you'll just have to wait
she said love dont come easy
its a game of give and take
you cant hurry love no you'll just have to wait
you gotta just give it time no matter how long it takes

but how many heartaches must i stand
before i find a love to let me live again
right now the only thing that keeps me hanging on
when i feel my strength, yeah is almost gone
i remember mama said*

how long must i wait
how much more can i take
before loneliness will cause my heart, heart to break
no i can't bear to live my life alone
i grow impatient for a love to call my own
but when i feel that i, i can't go on
these precious words keeps me hanging on
i remember mama said*

but i keep on waiting, anticipating
for that soft voice to talk to me at night
for some tender arms to hold me tight
i keep waiting, i keep on waiting
but it aint easy, it aint easy*


ok i love that song!! i heard it the other day and i knew it but i'd never really listend to the words. well now i like it even more! heehee

i just decided i like the word Honorificabilitudinitotibus which means the state of being able to achieve honors. I don't care about what it means i just liked the word. : )

I was reading this really cool book my parents have it has just a bunch of charts on theolgy. it is really intresting. i was reading all the attrbutes of God and then i was looking at the names of God the two i liked the most where
El Shaddai-Almighty God or All-sufficient God
and then
Yahwey Yire-Yahweh will provide
and then i was looking at names of the devil and the one i really liked was
god of this world- controls the philosophy of this world= 2 Cor. 4:4
i thought that was a really cool way of describing him. inresting.
this is something exciting i read in my devo book the other day...
'People may spurn your counsel and ignore your suggestions, but they can not escape your prayers.' Harold Sala hahaha!! Isn't that one cool?

well that looks like enough for now. : ) i hope you all are having a good time with life!
do you know what bothers me the most about myself? is how good of an actor i am, it's not cool.

Sometimes I wonder if I'll make it to 25 I wonder what will happen with my life. I don't really know what I want to do with my life. All I want to do is live my life as God wants me to. I don't know what that is but I'm not giving up. Even though some people have been telling me I'm not going to make it, something will happen and I will do something wrong. They are right to a point, I wouldn't make it on my own. But when the times get though I'll just lean on God and He will help me through. It's me against this world and I don't care.

Ok now it is time for me to stop thinking. : )

who needs a guy when you rock your own world?!?!?!

Ok so it is like the 4th and my first time to post this year.heehee

Today I was thinking about my Ireland family!!! I haven't seen them since last year!!! That is so sad. I miss them all so much. I haven't seen any of them since geting home. I have so many memories with all them! having no clue how to use my phone card(thank you Josh!), Tooth brush lady, risking my life to take a picture, secreatly eating ice cream in the kitchen, eating digestives with Abby, polkaing with Stephany, singing with Brianna, meeting people from colorado at the resturant in London, singing 'only hope' so much I'm sick of it, and sssoooooo many more.
Can you belive that all happened last summer?!?!?!?!?!?!?

"-To meet the guy that Hannah is gonna marry "u wann supersize those fries?" aww..hannah how romantic"

Thanks Olivia!! Someday that will happen. But why do you always think he is going to work at mcdonalds or some place like that? Hopefully he will work somewere else. But I guess if he is everything else i want then i can deal with the fact he works at mcdonalds. Question though...will he dance with me? That is a must. He doesn't have to dance good but as long as he is willing to dance with me it will all be good. Next time you come up we can continue those lessons on how to get a guy. How do you do it?!?!?!hahahaha I'll try the whole chili fries in the face. I guess guys like that.lol

HAPPY CHRISTMAS!!!!!!
and a merry new year!!!

well let us see, it is christmas eve. Tomorrow I will wake up and it will be christmas. wow That is crazy! Did I tell you guys tomorrow is CHRISTMAS!!! the one day every kid looks forward to all year, the day were I get so excited when everyone opens the gifts I gave them. Yup that is what tomorrow is. But the most important thing to remember is that God sent His son for us. It has never been more poweful then this christmas what it means. I guess I've been a kid all these years, a kid who only thought about the gifts and mind you it wasn't as much as the gifts I was getting but the ones I was giving. But this christmas I figured out how to be a kid and remember why I'm celebrating.

And the best thing about tomorrow is I won't be sick!!!! yesssss. Ok so instead of being tomorrow I feel rotten today! haha Ok so I take what I can get.

I don't know about you all but right now all the troops we have all over the world are in my prayers. I know one of the parts of christmas I love is being with my family, that is part of christmas. I can't picture it without them. So I just hope you all will keep them in your prayers also. And remember all you and all of us as americans have to be thankful for.

I hope all of you (whoever if anyone reads this.haha) have a wonderful day. If anyone who reads this is having a white christmas. Eat some snow for me :)

well let's see right now there is a sickness going around in our house. so fun!! and perfect timing also right before christmas. which means there is a 99% chance someone will be sick on christmas. And i'm just waiting to start throwing up now. i get one of the funnest parts, just sitting around waiting. Yup and my older sister is being herself and not helping me much. it is all fun stuff!!hahaha Well i guess i will just sit i'm tired of making cookies and i'm hoping that somehow, someway, i won't throw up. I hate yes HATE throw up with passion. but i did decided that it is ok to eat the pizza now because i'd rather have fun at eat now. And plus i'd rather throw up something then nothing. so that is it. so long for now.

I just decided that all moms who have two sons have to be a bit crazy to be able to deal with them and they are awesome and I don't know how they do it. yup. I baby sat 2 little boys today. They are so wield but they are fun to baby sit you just have to have a LOT of energy. i don't mean the moms were crazy when they had them just after they did. They become crazy so they could do it. I've always wanted boys when I have kids and the ones i baby sat today didn't change me. I just decided that I'm going to become crazy! So that was my thought for the day.

"You've failed many times, although you don't remember. You fell down the first time you tried to walk. You almost drowned the first time you tried to swim. . . . Don't worry about failure. . . . Worry about the chances you miss when you don't even try."

"God allows us to experience the low points of life in order to teach us lessons we could not learn in any other way. The way we learn those lessons is not to deny the feelings but to find the meanings underlying them."

a good friend is one who will make you feel happy when love isn't around (that is such a true quote in my life!)

ok so those are just some cool quotes i found.

so what can i say i'm a blonde!
tonight at awanas me and my friend (also a blonde) were puting a table away. so it belonged behind a couch, so i was moving it and set it right on her foot! then she was just like 'oh haha that is ok' then next thing i know she has me pinned up against the wall with the table. she totaly didn't even realize it ether. so i was like 'aagghhhh i'm stuck!' and all the while all the little girls are sitting there laughing at us. hahahahaha it was ssoooo funny!!! me and my friend were like 'see this is what happens when you send two blondes to do a job!'
so i had a lot of fun tonight at awanas. the girls are always really fun.

This is who I am.
I'm 5'6. I have blonde hair and blue yes.
I love wearing flip-flops, taking walks in the rain and singing while I'm walking.
I love going out at night and looking at the stars, cuddling up on the couch with a nice cup of tea and a good book.
I love listening to Josh Groban (his voices is so amazing) and wearing my pink plastic crown.
I like turning up my music and dancing in front of the mirror, taking long walks and listening to the birds sing.
I love it the way one rose can signify so much.
I like history. I like moca frapucciono, used book stores,
and the way the sun rises in between the mountains.
I love laughing so hard it hurts, singing in the shower.
I love splashing in the ocean and running through the fields.
I love how paintings can say so much and old black and white photos.
There are a lot of funny things that I like.
But they are what makes me well...ME!

HOW CAN I KEEP MY FEET ON THE GROUND WHEN I KNOW I WAS BORN TO FLY? (some song i heard the other day)

whoever said life was easy didn't know how to live

ok just some random thoughts for today